Ballade Of An Anti-Puritan, A

Author: Gilbert Keith Chesterton


    They spoke of Progress spiring round,
    Of Light and Mrs. Humphry Ward,
    It is not true to say I frowned,
    Or ran about the room and roared;
    I might have simply sat and snored,
    I rose politely in the club
    And said, "I feel a little bored;
    Will someone take me to a pub?"

    The new world's wisest did surround
    Me; and it pains me to record
    I did not think their views profound,
    Or their conclusions well assured;
    The simple life I can't afford,
    Besides, I do not like the grub,
    I want a mash and sausage, "scored"
    Will someone take me to a pub?

    I know where Men can still be found,
    Anger and clamorous accord,
    And virtues growing from the ground,
    And fellowship of beer and board,
    And song, that is a sturdy cord,
    And hope, that is a hardy shrub,
    And goodness, that is God's last word,
    Will someone take me to a pub?

                        ENVOI

    Prince, Bayard would have smashed his sword
    To see the sort of knights you dub,
    Is that the last of them, O Lord!
    Will someone take me to a pub?

Type of Poem: Ballad

Date Written:

Date Published:

Language: English

Keywords: Public Domain

Source: Public Domain Collection

Publisher:

Rights/Permissions: Public Domain

Comments/Notes: This poem is a humorous, yet thoughtful critique of the speaker's contemporary society, particularly its intellectual circles. It cleverly interweaves themes of dissatisfaction with modernity, yearning for simplicity, and the human need for companionship and camaraderie. The speaker's repeated plea, "Will someone take me to a pub?" underlines his dissatisfaction with the stuffy, pretentious environment of the 'club' and his desire for an earthier, more genuine experience.

The poem's structure, specifically its use of a repeated refrain, adds a rhythmic, almost song-like quality to the verses. This musicality enhances the poem's humorous tone while also reinforcing its key themes. The speaker's longing for the 'fellowship of beer and board' and 'song' suggests an appreciation for traditional, communal experiences and a rejection of the isolating, pretentious intellectualism he finds himself surrounded by. The poem also employs irony effectively, juxtaposing highbrow references (like Mrs. Humphry Ward, a popular novelist of the time) with the speaker's desire for simple pleasures, like pub food. This ironic tone supports the poem's critique of intellectualism and its celebration of authenticity and camaraderie. The envoi, or concluding stanza, adds a final, poignant note of longing for the valor and nobility of the past, emphasizing the speaker's disillusionment with the present.

Understanding Ballads

A ballad is a form of verse, often a narrative set to music, that has been a cornerstone of storytelling across various cultures. Traditionally passed down orally, ballads are known for their rhythmic structure and often tell tales of love, adventure, and heroism.


Ballads are characterized by their strong rhythm and repetition, making them both memorable and engaging. Here are some defining features:

  • Narrative Structure: Ballads typically tell a story, often a dramatic or emotional tale that unfolds in a straightforward, chronological order.
  • Quatrain Stanzas: Most ballads are composed of quatrains (four-line stanzas) with a rhyme scheme of ABAB or ABCB, which adds to the musicality of the verse.
  • Repetition: Refrains or repeated lines are common in ballads, helping to emphasize key themes or emotions and making the ballad easier to remember.
  • Oral Tradition: Many ballads originated from oral traditions, which means they were passed down through generations by word of mouth before being written down.

From medieval minstrels to contemporary songwriters, ballads have continued to evolve, remaining a beloved form of expression that captures the human experience in a way that is both poetic and accessible.